How to Not Fit In

Wear sock that don’t match
Especially on Tuesday and Friday
And always with shorts
Wear a wrinkled pink blouse
With a bright red skirt
Red and pink are in the same family
Aren’t they?

Don’t get subtle hints
Be confused by mixed messages
And laugh at inappropriate jokes
Always say what you mean
And mean what you say
Because no one else does it that way

Take everyone at face value
Be open and honest
In everything you do
Having no hidden meaning behind your words
No hidden agenda behind your actions
Is sure to frighten and confuse

Be loud and boisterous in public
Quite and reserved at home
Have moods that are affected by the weather
Remember to be daring and bold
Always act as if you’ll never grow old

Wave with both hands
Bounce into rooms
Offer everyone a hug
And feel bad when they refuse
Dance when you are happy
And wilt when you are sad

When there is a job to do
Be the first to volunteer
Once people start to gossip
That you’re trying to take charge
Don’t volunteer the next time
And they will complain about that too

Be friendly to everyone
Regardless of this or that
Refuse to take sides in disputes
At least, most of the time
See both sides of a debate
Try to get other people to do that too
It helps if you’re cute

Be more comfortable around pets than kids
Wear pyjamas all day
Don’t go to bed until 2
Read lots of books
Watch too much Star Trek
Be sure to listen to Punk Rock too

Walk widdershins in a Wiccan Circle
Forget which way is East
Write whole Invocations
And don’t remember a word of them
When asked to bring a broom
Show up with a robotic vacuum

Speak your mind all the time
As for peer pressure
Never give in
No matter they may say
Or how they treat you
Always love yourself first
And promise you’ll never change you!

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